Wednesday, November 25, 2009

He's just not that into it.

So when Kevin asked me to marry him i was beyond excited,
and as time passed i started to plan more .
Well with planning is compromising and putting ideas together.
in my case we are sooo not on the same page of our planning wedding :(
He wants to just go to the court house and i ignore him when he says that.
He says why waste soo much money on a wedding that's just ONE day??
:( :( :( :(
I guess he's just not that into it.
He doesn't realize how important this day is gonna be for me !
I dunno i wanna just strangle him but then there really wont be a wedding !
Oh well i gotta just hope for him to wake up and realize how this truly makes me feel!

Finding My Perfect Dress

I've been doing alot of looking online for dresses and i found a few i like .....
I am gonna have my dress custom made for me, but here are a few that
i really fell in love with :)
maybe a little something from each ! Who knows!!
i sent here all these pictures and she is gonna draw sum designs out for me!
When she does i will definitely post them up :)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


When i was in Arizona a few months ago i took that chance to check out different cake designers
and after long thoughts and whats smart price wise i decided to go with "Kick Ass Kakes"
Jay T Murphy is the guy who is designing my master piece ;)
Sorry but u will just have to wait for my wedding pictures to see what it actually looks like !
Cant have u steeling my design ! Just know its gonna be WAYYYY different then what u have ever seen before

He said "Can we just go to VEGAS?"

So Planning my wedding has not been as easy as i expected.
Already Kev is giving me a hard time !!
The other night we were sitting down and i was going over the cost of the different venues &
DO you even know what he said???
i was ready to chop his head off! I was like ARE YOU KIDDING?!!!
My first wedding and ONLY wedding and he wants to do it in VEGAS!!
He was so serious ,he said why not ? Micheal Jordan got married in a drive thru!

I'm NOT Micheal Jordan!
Vegas weddings are for certain people, and MOST definitely NOT for me.
I cant even imagine getting married in a drive thru or by ELVIS!

Well i guess i just have to keep taking DEEP DEEP breathes & hopefully i wont pull out my own hair !!!!
Wish me LUCK!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Wedding Time

I'm doin it!
After almost 6 years of being with Kevin , and doing everything possible to mess it up
he has decided to marry me . Now for those of you that know me , well you know i am gonna make this a HUGE event but on a reasonable budget Well reasonable to me is a little more then what kev thinks ;)!!
I will keep you all updated on my wedding plans month by month .
And I will be on Wild 101 fm in idaho every thursday morning with Rick Moorten & the wild wake up show talking about planning the wedding and how crazy it gets and just drama ! ! :)
it will be AMAZING!
every Thursday @ 8:50 am
on Rick Moorten & the wild wake up show
on Wild 101
P.S Kev there is no turning back now YOUR mine ;)

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Drugs are for LOSERS

Well Tomorrow will be my 1 year sober.Wow,let me just start by saying it hasn't been easy. but the longer it is that I've used the stronger i get. I started using when i was 12. all up until i was 18 and then off and on from there.My life was so shitty because of drugs.I missed out on so damn much. I blamed everyone for my addiction and i never looked at myself and realized it's all ME , and I don't need this. I am so lucky to still be alive. People using as long as i did end up dead or locked up.My biggest excuse was I'm only using to get skinny.LOL well then it just got to the point where i loved it . It took me years to open my eyes but i have a my fiance and some family members to thank for never giving up on me. I am sober and feeling on top of the world. i am so lucky i never ended up looking like ne of these ladies

But shit i wasn't looking to hot myself after awhile.

Fuck that shit NEVER AGAIN, I got to much to lose.

If you struggle with addiction just get HELP! if I can do it anyone can!

Monday, November 2, 2009


Sometimes you go a lifetime without finding that one person that can truly connect with you.
Well in my case i did. Alot of times you hear people saying omg we are so much alike, we like the same color and tv shows,Well in this case OMG we are alike.
Not with our favorite colors,cuz we both like 2 diff one's ,and we have only 2 shows in common
It's more then those things.We connect on a higher level emotionally.
No we are not lovers but if i was gonna go gay i would def try and make her mine ;)
She just has a way to always make me feel like life will be OK.
She calls me everyday when she wakes up, that may not be alot to you.
But to me, well it makes my day. I have 2 other bff's and i love them just as much.
But i dunno ,Emily just gets me unlike nobody else.
She never judges me and she is not afraid to tell me when i am wrong.
I tell her EVERYTHING.
I don't do that with anyone else , and probably never will.
All i know is the day i walked into sugar daddy's i knew we were meant to be best Friends.
Thank you Emily for calling me everyday ,never judging me , and always having time for me :)
I love you Putita.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

I’m becoming “one of them”

You know "them" the people who actually like to work out ! I use to be super obsessed with wanting to be skinny. I did some stupid shit to make that happen like eating disorders, throwing up , starving myself, and even drugs, I Finally realized, hey maybe i should just work out!? I mentally changed my mind of always thinking I need to look like the girls on TV,When i really need to look like me :) ! I am taking my time, not rushing myself, and the results are coming along great . And the best part is I feel GREAT!

LOVE tattoo's

Ever since i was little i've had a thing for tattoos ! i got my first tattoo done at sum dudes apartment and it was of a play boy bunny lol ,what can i say i was young and stupid. so to fix that mistake i got this cute hello kitty to cover it up!

I have 13 tattoo's and i hope to get tons more .

I swear i want my knuckles done but in 30 yrs my mind might change on that, so to get my fix on that craving i got the lil black heart :) will repost once healed :)


This year for Halloween i went as Snow white:) in my case snow brown ;) LOL
I had a blast drank alot danced alot and had enjoyed myself to the fullest :)
Only thing missing was my AZ girls but hey next year :) here are some pictures of my night :)
my favorite costume i seen, Vanessa don't you love it! :)

She was my Devil :)

Mr. Complex and I

These 3 dressed up as "On air personalities " & a "DJ"

What a great night!